Rainy days and Wednesdays...

As if "hump day" wasn't hard enough to get over, does it have to be so dark and stormy too? I normally love rainy days but lately, I have so much to do inside AND outside that I don't even know where to start.  I guess this is where a written list and an extra pot of coffee will help.


I read this somewhere.  To have something become a habit, you need to do it every day for a minimum of 30 days.  If that is the case, why do people become smokers after a puff or two? I was never a smoker, I thought it was gross. But for some, it becomes a habit almost immediately.  The same thing with sugar or salt.  If you love either, or both, a taste is all it takes and you want more.  Now why can't it be so easy with flossing, exercise, or cleaning the house?


I think I want to have a couple of bumper stickers made. Okay, you read it here first:

• Dead people can't shop.  Phone down, buckle up.
• Dead people  can't make love. Phone down, buckle up. 

I was at the 7-11 a couple of mornings ago putting gas in my car.  I looked over to see a young  girl doing the same. She was maybe 17 or 18 at the most and already high maintenance. With bleached, flat ironed long hair, spray tanned to within a shade of an old penny, she also applied more mascara than I ever thought you could fit on a set of eyelashes.  Anyway, she finished putting the gas in her little white Volvo, jumps in the car and pulls away without bothering to buckle up. I didn't see her long enough to see if she checked her text messages too. Now why would someone take so much time to make sure they looked that way and not take the time to protect their facade and bod by clicking their seat belt?  All I could think was if she ever go into a car accident, all the mascara in the world wouldn't keep that face from meeting the windshield head on.  

So people, PLEASE buckle up and put away that phone!  I don't care that the seat belt is going to wrinkle your shirt or that it is uncomfortable. And the phone? There is NO call or text that can't wait! Do everything you can to keep yourself safe and those of us sharing the road with you safe. After all, someone out there loves you, including me!


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Stop and smell the peonies....

Unless you are allergic, I am certain that  most people have a favorite flower. I love many flowers, so much so that when someone asked me what the color scheme of my wedding I replied "floral". I even left the original florist I had hired when told I couldn't have peonies in my wedding bouquet. I found a floral shop that would accomodate my wishes. I have flowers connected to many memories of my life from loving dandelions when I was very small, to my mother being enamored of daisies and black-eyed susans, to my grandmother being able to grow ANYTHING especially incredibly vibrant pansies, then falling in love with peonies when spending eight of my formative years growing up on the Val-Kill estate of Eleanor Roosevelt.

When my family moved from Connecticut to New York, Val-Kill was still privately owned and separated into several apartments and the main cottage. We lived on the second floor of the furniture factory. Once the first Spring of our stay there arrived, I had never seen so many daffodils in one place. The front property was truly a sea of yellow.  Adjacent to the tennis court we had started to work the soil for planting a vegetable garden. In the same area, dozens of dark green leaved plants were growing.  I knew they weren't weeds but not any more. As they reached a height of 3 to 4 feet, hundreds of golf ball sized buds appeared.  In the next few weeks a profusion of peonies bloomed in shades ranging from white to pale pink to the darkest fuchsias and the scent emitting from these huge flowers was intoxicating.  I have loved the peony ever since.

In my self proclaimed hometown of Poughkeepsie, I can tell you where almost every peony is blooming in every neighborhood. When my husband and I became homeowners, we did some planting in the fall and we HAD to plant peonies. It took a couple of years for them to fill in and bloom, but now they are glorious. I do take the time to smell them and clip them for vases in doors (even though they could bring ant or two with them). I just wish the flowers lasted a little longer and they bloomed more than once a year. But I guess good and wonderful things come to those that are patient and appreciative.

I guess that really is a pearl of wisdom that I need to be more conscious of.  I hope this works with my kids!


Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Rain, rain go away...

Now I like a good rainy day as much as the girl but this Spring has been a little wetter than I would care for. If there was a Noah, with his ark, he would be LOVING  this weather.  I don't mind the dreary days on occasion because they are a good excuse to stay in and get the work done that you want to put off when it is nice out, like cleaning the bathroom, going through paperwork, and scraping the walls (which is what I did today). If there aren't a million chores waiting, you could stay in bed or curl up on the couch and watch Law and Order or the Food Channel all day. Life does have to go on though.

The sun did come out for about a half hour today. It was beautiful.  I can't wait until it is out for at least a whole day, preferably leading into a long stretch of blue skies and line dried laundry. I know when this weather gears up and stays around for the long haul , the temperatures go up, the lawn needs to be mowed more (much to my son's dismay) and ants show up for picnics. Then come the lazy, hazy days of summer. I am not quite ready for those yet but if dries things up a bit, then bring them on!

Better living through chemistry?

If you have watched any kind of television over the last 5 or so years, have you noticed how many commercials there are for prescription medications? I am not one to take anything anyway. I have to headache for a whole day or have one so bad that it incapcitates me, before I will even take an aspirin. So when I see all of these ads, I really wonder about who is taking these to heart. And if these meds are available by prescription only, are doctors watching too, thinking of which of their patients need them? And have you really listened to the side effects? They almost sound worse than the actual afflictions they are supposed to help.


And does all of the rhetoric drive up the costs of these medications? I know named brand prescriptions are incredibly expensive. Then what if you don't have insurance? I know all of these questions can't be answered in a little blog, but I do worry about how all of this affects my friends, family and those I don't even know, especially older folks. I must have absorbed some of these tensions from my late mother-in-law who lived to worry about anything and everything. My husband often says it is a miracle that he and his sister (may she rest), ever learned to walk.


In any case, if there are people who truly needs these medications, I am glad there are so many things available to help. But for the rest of us, hopefully we will never need to ask our doctors about the latest little pill being shoved down our throats via the latest tv ads.


Thanks you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Bye, bye...Oprah.

For the longest time, my kids knew that one of my fondest wishes was to go to the Oprah show, but as I catch up with Oprah and Sarah Ferguson, the ads in between say that there are only 11 shows to go.  I really started to think about why I never got around to making a trip and seeing Oprah in the flesh. Well, I guess I have been a little busy. So here is a quick laundry list of what I have been doing over the last 25 years. 

• I survived my 20's, 30's, and most of my 40's
• I have held 17 different jobs
• I met and fell in love with my husband. We just celebrated our 20th anniversary.
• With the same man, we have brought 4 amazing children into the world.
• We changed thousands of diapers, made as many bottles, meals, and beds.
• We have buried all 4 of our parents, my husband's sister and 3 best friends.
• I have moved 9 times.
• I learned how to drive. Since then, I have driven countless of miles, carpooled hundreds of kids and adults alike, and have grown to love all of errands, road trips, and freedom.
• As technology has taken over and people have become more disconnected, I started my own blog called "Because I Can". I want to stay connected and create a conversation. We still need to be able to talk to each other. 
• I have found myself, more or less, with a little help from Oprah and so many others. There really no such thing as "self help".  It takes a village to get through this life, and that is a good thing. It is okay to be alone but no one should ever be lonely.

So as Oprah goes into the next phase of her life, I wish her well. As much as she has affected our world, things certainly won't be the same without her on the tv 5 days a week. But I am truly grateful for the time we have spent together, even though it was only in my living room.

In the past 25 years, I have come to know that I am all that too. After all, she hasn't had the chance to meet ME either. Our paths may still cross someday!

Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

I'm baaaack!!!

Did you miss me?  I know I missed sending my blogs out to all of you. So I will do my best to catch up.


In the time since you heard from me last, we have had natural disasters, a fairytale wedding, and the take down of one of the most evil people to ever walk the Earth.  On a lighter note, I spent 2 and a half days in New Orleans with my beloved husband, in turn celebrating our 20th wedding anniversary, saw Rod Stewart and Jake Gyllenhaal (goodness, he is even more gorgeous in person!!!)  there too, and FINALLY started painting my dining room.


Next to the Fall, this is my favorite time of the year.  It feels like the possibilities are endless. Everyone has shaken of the dark doldrums of winter and the flowers are in bloom. The trees and grass are starting to green and I can start to hang my clothes on the line (hellooooo lower electric bills!) and I want to have my pink bicycle repaired. The less I have to spend on gas, the happier I will be.


In addition, I am going to fine tune my personal attitudes and embrace all of my blessings, of which there are many. So be well. There is so much more to come.


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

The Fountain of Youth?

I can name that tune in one nanosecond...


In all honesty, I cannot tell you what I had for lunch yesterday, or today for that matter. I tried to recall the meals before I started to type this, but I have drawn a complete blank. What part of your brain is used to store and recall this information? I haven't a clue. But turn on the radio, and with one split second of a song play, nine times out of ten, I can tell you what it is. Especially if it was recorded in the last 30 years or so.


Now it doesn't matter what kind of music it is. It can be rock, heavy metal, easy listening or current pop tunes, I can tell you the title and the name of the group or singer. My kids are incredulous of the whole process. I guess I didn't watch a whole lot of television in my youth because I really remember thousands of songs (except most new country) and with the single sound of a note, the information just pops into my head. The Rolling Stones, Barry Manilow, and Lady Gaga all have equal time in my brain.


I don 't know if this bodes well for memories or lack thereof when the aging process really starts kicking in. I hope I can keep surprising my kids with this Rain Man type skill along with having the capacity of being nostalgic about their youth. Because this is the good stuff!


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

No empty nest here!

For the longest time, my husband and I have been telling the kids that when the time comes, WE are going to move out and they can have the house. We don't think that they will ever  leave. Maybe that it isn't a bad thing. For now, I don't mind them all being home.


In fact, I like that they WANT to be home. Their friends are always welcome here and 9 meals out of 10, there is enough food for at least one more person to break bread with us. When the kids are home and any of their "peeps" are here, I know that they are safe. It is the same thing with kids sleeping over. I don't mind a houseful then either, for the same reason, everyone is safe.


Our front porch is offering the same sanctuary to birds. There is a corner of our front porch roof that birds always construct a nest in. It doesn't matter what my husband does to dissuade them from building there, but the birds can't be deterred. It is an area that is protected from the elements and larger birds can't get to, so those little eggs are safe until they hatch. Last year, a lazy bird took advantage of the nest after the first chicks grew and took flight. It is like a timeshare bird condo. 


When my husband took the nest out of its' corner, he put it in the backyard. It came out as one, solid piece of construction. It was so well made, that it remained together for the entire winter. It survived the elements intact. I guess the home we live in is equally safe and sound. It was built in 1871 and is still going strong. And if it can if it can survive sheltering  our family, I am sure it can survive another 140 years after we are gone.


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Comfort in the familiar...

Even if I have already seen the episode 10 times, if I am flipping the channels and "Law and Order" is on, I will watch it again.  Don't get me wrong, I also love "NCIS" (the original, not L.A.), thanks to my friend T.! But I LOVE L&O, especially Criminal Intent.  I was so sad when the Goren and Eames characters left. I was VERY happy too see that they are going to back in a new season on USA network.


As a rule, I don't get attached to too many t.v. shows, especially because my kids have taken over the living room area. When Fox cancelled "24", I was pretty much done with t.v. Now, there are other shows that I do like but I if I miss them, it's okay.  If a repeated episode of L&O is on, I will sit and watch it or just let it be background noise. I like that the show has the same routine, just the criminals and crimes vary. And each story wraps up in the hour. The good guy doesn't win every time. Real life is like that too.


Now with a new season of L&O Criminal Intent, I will do all I can to catch it but if I can't catch it the first time, that is what the DVR is for. Then I can watch it anytime with no commercials, preferably when the kids are not in the living room so I can have a place to sit, and visit familiar characters catching the bad guys. Thank goodness that all will be right with the world again. Welcome back Mr. D'Onofrio and Ms. Erbe. We missed you!


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

V. versus C. ...

How can a 45 lb. 7 year old stop a 245 lb. 17 year old in his tracks? Tickle him!!!

My youngest is a velcro monkey who can crawl on and hang onto pretty much anyone or anything and right now, he is busy roughing up his big brother.  There is almost  nothing as pure as the laughter derived from a good, solid tickle.  And the littlest brother can hold his own with all of his siblings and really isn't afraid of anyone or anything. I guess this will serve him well when he gets older. There is something to said for being fearless, and he certainly is that. As for the tickling, no one can tickle anyone as good as me!

Being a mom, we know all of our children's ticklish spots. And every once in a while, the tickle monster does have to come out. It helps keep things in order and lets everyone know who is boss. And that would be Mom.  And they can't turn the tables because I am not ticklish. I don't know if ever was and I guess that is okay. But there has to be something very liberating by being able to laugh from a great tickle fest.

So try and laugh this week, and give someone a little (or big) tickle especially if they need it. You both will feel so much better!

Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words. 

If it is Sunday....I am clipping coupons!

I know there are television shows and "experts" talking about the virtues of clipping coupons, but this is nothing new, especially at my house. I have been clipping and saving for years, before it was "cool" and a reality t.v. show.


I have always had the Sunday paper delivered. It isn't because I wanted to read the latest news or gossip, it is because of the coupons. I get my local paper and the Daily News (the paper is for my husband, the coupons are for me). I put on a pot of coffee and get my favorite scissors and start clipping away.


Keeping a family of 6 fed, bathed, and dressed is no easy feat. This is where coupons come in. I know the process is time consuming but is well worth my while. For example, I had to make a CVS run today. I had my coupons and Extra Bucks (additional coupons for already shopping there) ready to go. I also bring the flier. With the sales, coupons, and Extra Bucks, I saved 61% on my final total. The cashier asked me to go grocery shopping with her so she could save too.


I also have the same success at the supermarket. I watch the sales, bring my bags, and give myself time to be thorough. I saved almost 70% off my total bill.  Please know that I do not shop every week and I don't hit all of my local supermarkets. I have favorites that I frequent. I don't have time to drive all over the place and with the price of gas these days, I have to be practical. And I do find by shopping in this manner, the brand names are almost always cheaper than the off brands or the generic products.


The amount I save helps pay for the extras, like a few days at the beach in the summer, or a family outing, or a nice dinner out. It kills me to pay full price for anything and with being a diligent shopper and coupon clipper, I don't have to. So if you are still not compelled to clip and save, hold on to your coupons for me, I'll come and pick them up on my way to the market.

Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Spring cleaning for my brain...

I spent the last three days cleaning to start my Spring cleaning. I still have PILES of stuff and paper to deal with but I have thrown out and donated so much that I can probably start the heavy duty tasks next week.


I actually like this process of cleaning, purging, and preparing for the warmer weather. The work is mindless for me and sometimes it is good for me NOT to think too much.  As many of you know, I have had an awful lot of "life" happen recently and the focus it takes to organize, file, and figure out what to tackle next is very cathartic for me.  There are so many things that my husband and I want to accomplish to make our house a home, it is good to have such a long "to do" list.


I will keep all of you posted on the progress. I need someone to hold me accountable, so why not all of you?


And now, I would love to make this blog interactive. So please tell me what project you would like to accomplish this Spring. And if there is something you would like me to ruminate on, I am always up for a challenge. On that note, I have a load of clothes to dry. Now THAT is the story of my life. I will NEVER be caught up on the laundry!


Thank you for precious time with me and my words. 

Writer's block...

Just to let all of you know that I am suffering from a bit of writer's block. I am going to take a not too long shower (because I have to be eco-friendly after all) and hopefully have a good night's sleep. Let's hope resting the old brain box will help.


Sweet dreams everyone!


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

A change of plan...

I was originally going to write about something light but then I watched a special on PBS about a woman named Fanya, who survived World War II and the invasion of her town in the Ukraine by the Russians and Germans. At the age of 86, she still travels the country, speaking to all who listen. She tells her truth in an unvarnished, in your face fashion. She especially wants to reach inner city students who she considers survivors too. She wants you too know that there is always hope and she will spend the rest of her life giving back, by sharing her story and making all who come in contact with her, a witness to her life and in turn, history.

I try very hard to not take any bit of my life for granted. Fanya's story makes me appreciate my life all the more. We have very charmed lives, even if struggles are present. And there are so many people that want to help if you need it. I have been thinking about volunteering, now that my Blockbuster career is over, it may be time to give back. If you are in a little bit of a funk, or are experiencing a rough spot in your life. please take a minute to count your blessings and take care of yourself and then do a little something for someone else. It will make you feel SO good.  I promise.

Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

It's Girl Scout cookie time!

Along with April showers bring May flowers, and the smell of new crayons announcing it is almost time for back to school, I so look forward to my first box of thin mints of the Spring. I do love other Girl Scout cookies but there is something about thin mints.  In this house of six people, an open box of those cookies last maybe an hour. And somewhere along the way, someone told me about putting them in the freezer. They are yummy that way too.


But as much as I love those cookies, I am partial to my 13 year old son's chocolate chip cookies.  He has baked many variations of a memorized recipe and I love them all.  He prepares the dough and then delegates the forming and baking to his big brother. They are made with love and conviction and even impress their dad, the baker.


I know the thin mints are only available once a year, my sons' cookies are available all year long. And that is a good thing.  I better see if all the ingredients are here so we are prepared for that last Girl Scout cookie being devoured... I guess I am going to the supermarket!


Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

What did you say?

As I was drinking my morning coffee, I realized I forgot to post my blog last night. I had come home late from a candle party and talking to my friend about life stuff and just completely forgot. It is okay though. My friend needed to talk and I was glad to listen.


It took me a long time to learn to listen to pretty much anything.  I always heard everything but didn't always stop and really listen. You have to be engaged and focused and compassionate, even if whatever the person is saying is annoying or frustrating. What I have found over my many years of interacting with all kinds of people, we all just want to be heard.


If you have time today, call someone you haven't talked to in a while or engage your family in conversation. Yes, that means turning off the tv,computer,cell phone, ipod, etc.(texting in the talk DOES NOT count!). You may be pleasantly surprised to hear what they have to say. Practicing the fine art of conversation AND listening may just save the world.


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Spring is here...

My 7 year old sang in his school's spring concert tonight.  Since he is the last child born, I have come to realize that many events will be the last.  So I won't hear another second grade choir sing with their sweet little voices. Tonight they sang "Like a Prayer" which I thought was interesting choice but they did a great job.


As a rule, I cry when I attend any of these events.  I don't know why, I just tear up. Tonight was no exception.  But this time I had a really good reason. The other song the choir sang was "In My Life" by the Beatles.  This was the song that my sister-in-law chose to dedicate to my brother-in-law during her memorial service. I have listened to the words before but never really heard them until my little guy was singing along to the song during the service.  I bent down and asked him how he knew the words.  He told me it was the song that he was singing for his concert. It was so touching to hear it being so beautifully sung tonight.


Along with this rite of Spring, comes daffodils blooming, forsythia blossoming, and hanging the clothes on the line.  I don't want to go on anymore about this right now though. Laundry leads to Spring cleaning and that will be a whole other blog posting.


Have a wonderful night, and sweet, sweet dreams. And take the time to listen a song that touches your heart.  It will make you smile and stay with you all day.


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Two tickets please...

My oldest son and I just got back from going to see "The Source Code". It is the new movie with Jake Gyllenhaal and Michele Monahan. I guess you could say it covers the premise of time travel but it does it in a Die Hard meets Groundhog Day kind of way.  And it isn't on the epic scale of "Inception" (which is still one of my all time favorite movies) even though it has a lot of action, it is a much smaller movie.


For the longest time I have asked "Is this all there is?" and who are we to say yea or nay? This movie asks that question but doesn't give you the answer.  It actually makes you think and that is very appealing to me.  I love action movies and romantic comedies as much as the next person. And sometimes I don't want to think about anything (Hangover for example, no brains, just stupid funny) or non stop, mind numbing action (Expendables, tongue-in-cheek and action packed) but thinking is good too.


After working for over 10 years at Blockbuster (on and off), I have watched many movies, discussed many, recommended some, begged customer to NOT rent some, and waited for new movies to come it.  But was always the most fun to me was to tell someone about a little gem that they may have overlooked, or even better, disagreeing about any movie.  Not everyone likes then same thing. If they did, Hollywood would be out of business.  But Hollywood keeps giving people something to look forward to.  A couple of hours in a darkened theater, sipping a soda and munching on some popcorn is still the best way to escape from the everyday grind.


Whether the movie is good or bad or just okay, there is always another one coming out the following  Friday.  That one might end up being your all time favorite. 


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Can't sleep? Watch Craig Ferguson!

A few months ago, my sons started to watch The Late, Late Show with Craig Ferguson on CBS. I was usually asleep when it was on, but with the magic of the DVR, they recorded several episodes and I started watching them during the day.


It takes a lot for me to really, truly laugh. This crazy, hyper kinetic, Americanized Scotsman is hysterical. He doesn't take himself too seriously and seems to be having more fun than his audience. He is raunchy and curses and gets bleeped a lot, and must drive the censors nuts. He doesn't have a band like all of the other more well known talk show hosts.  His side kick is a robot named Geoff and a little person named TJ who has been painted gold as the Oscar and is dressed up as a leprechaun as of late.  There is also a horse (2 people in a horse suit) that is named Secretariat and comes out dances when the doorbell rings.


It sounds insane and chaotic and it is. It doesn't even matter who his guest is, I watch it anyway, just for him. If you need to break up the monotony of your day, and you can't sleep, tune into the Late Late Show.  He'll make you laugh, unless you are sleeping and I hope you won't be disappointed.


Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

Hey Dad, what's for dinner?

I am sure for most of you moms (and dads) out there, one of the most stressful parts of your day is figuring out what to feed your family every day. You have to plan the menu, shop for the ingredients, prepare it and then hope that your family will eat it.

I have been blessed to not have to think about any of that by falling in love and marrying my husband, the baker and chef. His gift for food is apparent by the amazing meals he prepares for his family daily.  He doesn't just cook, he creates dishes worthy of any restaurant. He has set the bar high though. Since these meals are made regularly, he now has 4 food snobs to deal with.

All of our kids are fairly adventurous eaters.  Don't get me wrong, they don't eat EVERYTHING but they do eat about 99% of it and if their dad wants to make something different, they will usually try it. The dishes he makes that they do love never taste the same way twice.  It is also next to impossible to go out to eat any more. Their palates are so sophisticated that even the 7 year old will comment about the quality of the food and heaven forbid the meal is inadequate or the service is sub par. They will be vocal about their dissatisfaction with the experience.

Now, I tell people that I can get us fed, but my husband feeds us well.  I am in charge of big breakfast that usually happen when the kids are on break.  I will make homemade pancakes, frittatas, omelettes, hash and eggs, or from scratch French toast.  My go to dinner meal is homemade macaroni and cheese.  It is nice to have ONE dish that the kids like how I make it better than their dad. So unless I am making myself breakfast or brewing my next pot of coffee, I don't have to venture into my kitchen until my 7 year old makes the general announcement of "Time to eat everyone! Time to eat!"

This is how I like it. The kids are happy and well nourished and their dad gets to impress us with another feast fit for royalty.  Thanks Honey!  You are the Best!  And gee, I better go put up a wash to earn my keep.

Thanks for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Customer service goes both ways...

I have worked in customer service, to one extent or another, for almost three decades.  I know how to provide great customer service and I know how to be an exceptional customer.  All of my experience, and experiences, have provided me with valuable insights to this relationship.


I filled in at the Route 9 Blockbuster today.  My store officially closed more than two weeks ago so I had a little bit of breather before heading back into the trenches.  This store closes on the 10th so the location is in full liquidation mode.  The dynamic in the store is entirely different than when it was rental location.  One of my first customers of the day had an issue with a charge to his credit card, AND an attitude.  He had a copy of his statement.  I just needed to verify all the information, his membership and get the okay for a refund from the store manager, who I had to call at home and wake up.  Well I guess I didn't do this quickly enough for this gentlemen. Then he proceeded to tell me I was being rude.


Please don't bring this behavior to me. I have told many people, many times,  if you come you come to me with kindness,  I will return the same. Yes, things happen that can be frustrating, but any good customer service person is available to help you and WANTS to rectify the situation,  and will bend over backwards to do so. Just don't be mean, nasty, or bitchy. And PLEASE have the documents we need to help. Whether it be a bank statement or a receipt, bring it with you.  These things pave the way for issues to be resolved quickly for us both.  If you don't have these items, that is okay.  Being pleasant goes a LONG way.  We really do want you to leave happy.


On the flip side,  I do everything I can to be a good customer.  I will wait patiently on line, let someone in a rush go in front of me, try to have all the paperwork I need, and say "Hello" to the person that is waiting on me.  I say "please", "thank-you", and give a compliment if it is earned.  I have written letters and e-mails, and have called store managers and corporate offices if I have received exceptional customer service.  I have also done the same if the the service was horrible. This doesn't happen often though.  If you put out "good", you should get "good" back. I hope the next customer experience you have is a great one, no matter what side of the counter you are on.


Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Being in hot water...

When was the last time you took a bath?  Were you little?  Did your mom run the tub for you? Was it a bubble bath with Mr. Bubble perhaps?  Or was it soaking in epsom salts for an injury or oatmeal bath because of poison ivy?

I didn't appreciate the spiritual, Calgon take me away, feeling of a bath until I became a little older and a parent. I couldn't understand why anyone would want to sit in their own dirt. Then I realized since I was showering daily,  I was never really dirty. Taking a bath just became a nighttime ritual.

There is something truly comforting and soothing about hot water, bubbles, and a book or magazine, and/or a glass of wine. I have had a bath calm me when nothing else could and have had some of my best ideas have come from that time soaking.  I have fallen asleep in the tub and have spent so much time in there that I have become a pink, wrinkled raisin.

I know that  it takes a few extra minutes to actually bathe and you may not have the best bathtub to soak in. I am lucky to have an older, deep bath tub and it uses about the same amount of water as a leisurely shower. I have a special bubble bath but shower gel works nicely too.  Use what you love the smell of. Have a nice fluffy towel ready and your bathrobe robe or cozy jammies to keep the comforting feeling after you have drained the tub. (PLEASE don't forget a bathmat so you don't break your neck coming out of the tub!)

You owe it to yourself, and your mental health to sink into a tub, up to your chin, once in awhile. It will definitely give you a different perspective on things. Happy soaking!

Thank you for sharing your precious time with me and my words.

19 jobs and counting...

Since I am kind of, sort of, between jobs right now,  I had to take sometime to look at my job history and tweak my resume'.  In my almost 48 years of life, where I have worked steadily for 30 of those years, I have had about 19 jobs.  I know that in the past, the average person graduated from high school, went to college, graduated from there, and then worked at one job until they retired.  I don't think that this is happening as much as it used to.


I don't quite know why I have had so many different jobs, but I really don't regret any of them.  Some were better than others, and I have only been fired from one of those (I am fairly certain that the management and I couldn't agree to disagree and I was asked to go). As a rule,  I have been able to leave on my own terms and usually have had another gig ready to go.  And I will try pretty much anything.  


My consistent gig has been hairdressing which I have been doing since I was 18.  I have seen clients come and go but have been blessed to have a dozen or so folks been with me practically since I started.  They have been with me through just about everything and they aren't just my customers, they are a part of my extended, slightly dysfunctional family.  And I love them and grateful to them for sticking with me.


I have also worked in a fast food place, a gift store, a card shop, a handful of salons, a fitness club, and a nail salon.  I have bartended, catered, waitressed, house sat, delivered the newspapers, and managed a garage. I have worked in a now defunct movie store and I have tried a handful of different direct sales businesses. I am still with one of those companies and still love it because it fits in with whatever else I want to do.


I know that some people considered being married and being a parent a job, but I don't and never had considered it to be a job.  Being a wife and a mother was a choice for me and is really the only thing that completely fulfills me.  I adore my husband of almost 20 years and you will be hard pressed to find someone who is more insanely in love with all (4) of their children. Yes, sometimes parenting is challenging, but it is an adventure at the same time. I look forward to see how these humans turn out.


So, I am not quite sure what my next job will be, but whatever it is, I will give it my all until something else changes or comes up.  I am never afraid or nervous to try something new.  I never know if it will be the opportunity of a lifetime or just another stop on the road of my life.


But it seems like I might be sticking to this blog for awhile.  I have been wanted to write ever since I can remember and am grateful to those of you who have read what I have written.  This is giving me great satisfaction and could be my next big thing.


Thanks for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Life is a basket of laundry...

One blog posting won't ever be enough to explain my obsession and love of laundry.  Dirty or clean, I am passionate about my laundry.  The entire process of cleaning the clothes, drying the clothes (whether in the dryer or on the clothesline) brings me pure joy.


I have spent more time choosing a washer than my last car, and the shelves in my laundry room are like a laboratory.  Nothing is more satisfying to me than getting out a tough stain, hanging up hand wash, putting clean sheets on the bed and battling static cling.


Doing clothes for a family of six could be a full time job and it sometimes is. My daughter has started to help me over the past few months.  She needs to have as much of her wardrobe at the ready.  She does a great job.  It also helps that our front loading washing machine works as well as it does.  It is incredibly efficient, using less soap and less water.  Everything takes less time to dry too because the machine spins most of the water out of the clothes.  My first front loader lasted almost 10 years and literally did thousands of loads of wash.


And please, do yourselves a favor, don't buy cheap laundry detergent. Shop the sales and use Tide (again, this an unsolicited opinion) .  I have literally tried every brand and nothing works as well as Tide.  It gets the stains out, takes better care of the fabrics and lasts a long time. I also use only Clorox bleach.  It works very well also.  Fabric softeners are helpful, especially in the winter.  Get the one with the smell you like.


Believe it or not,  I also like to iron.  This chore didn't come to me naturally until my friend P. told me to splurge on an iron.  I did and this changed everything.  I use starch, and ironing water from an online company called The Laundress.  It makes the job a labor of love and pressed garments smell fantastic.


So if one of your chores is the laundry, try to hate it a little less.  After all, you can actually see the results of a job well done.  Take a moment to feel the clean sheets when you crawl into bed, or savor the fluffy towel you wrap yourself up in after your shower. And if you don't have to do your laundry because someone else in the house does it (I am talking to you T.!) give them a hug and thank them for a job well done.  Because keeping up on the laundry is like climbing a little bit of Everest, every day.


Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Coffee is love...

Anyone who has known me for more than 5 minutes, knows about my love for coffee.  If I didn't keep this love in check, it could border on obsession.  I can relate to the McDonald's ad where the guy won't talk to anyone before he has his morning coffee. I will talk before I have had that first cup of coffee, but I can't speak for the content of the conversation or retaining any memory of the replies.

The first cup of the day has to be HOT.  I do love iced coffee too.  I just find comfort in the mug being warm in my hands. There isn't an electric coffee maker on my counter.  I use a porcelain Melitta pot and matching with brown Melitta #4 paper filter.  I buy whole beans from Adams and grind them fresh. The tea kettle is boiling by now and I pour the almost boiling water into the filter two and half times.  The whole process takes about 10 minutes but it is so worth the wait. The brew is consistently rich, smooth, and fulfilling.  And it makes me blissfully happy.

Now I can't always have my first cup of coffee from home,  I have other outlets, found after much trial and error, research, and referrals.  I know it seems to be a bit excessive,  but trust me,  you don't want to spend any quality time with me if I haven't had a morning cup of java!

So my local (unsolicited) recommendations are as follows, in no particular order:

• Dunkin' Donuts on Rte. 44 (just past Adams).  The place is clean, the coffee is always fresh and the staff is very pleasant.  
• My friend S.'s house.  Her husband makes a fabulous cup of cappuccino.  I would happily pay him to make me coffee every day.
• Babycakes by Vassar College.  My husband and I go there on occasion for breakfast.  I don't know what kind of coffee it is but it is delicious and the mug is huge!
• My friend T.'s house.  She has one of those one cup at a time coffee makers.  I really don't mind what kind she gives me (as long as it isn't flavored) but I love the time I spend with her and her family in their kitchen.
• Lastly, the Crafted Cup on Raymond Avenue.  I started going there BEFORE they won "Best cup of coffee/latte" in Hudson Valley Magazine last year.  Their organic Woodstock blend coffee is Heaven squared.  It is fresh all day and you get a break on the cost when you bring your own mug.  They also have a frequent buyer card that gets you a free cup when you fill it with punches.  The owner is great and his staff is terrific.  And if you have time to sit, there are baked goodies, Wi-Fi, and handmade lattes in nice big mugs, soups, smoothies, and teas.  And it is local!

There are many places that have adequate coffee, but I have decided to never settle for mediocrity.  Life is too short for a lousy cup of coffee.

Thank you for spending your precious time with me and my words.

Tomorrow is another day...

But what about today?  I am nervous.  But I have wanted to blog for a very long time.  With everything that has happened recently,  I decided to start TODAY.  I don't know if anyone will follow my posts.  That is okay.  I am sure, over time,  something I type may touch someone.  A piece of advice may help someone.  A recommendation may help make someone's day easier.  A story may make someone laugh.  I don't know.  But that is okay. And it also part of what makes this an adventure.  I hope someone wants to come along for this journey.

Five days ago, my family buried my 61 year old sister-in-law. She fought not one round of cancer, but two.   And man, did she FIGHT!  Until she took her very last breath,  she fought.  Her adoring husband was by her side for every minute.  He didn't eat, he barely slept, and their love filled the room, without a word being said.  His heart is in a million pieces, and our hearts ache with him.

I know deaths occur everyday. But my family have lost so many loved ones recently, including my mother-in-law too.  And that was only six months ago.  We haven't had time to breathe or recover.  I know conventional wisdom says that time heals all.  We just have to put one foot in front of the other.  But I don't know if I will ever get over my sister-in-law's death.  This one will never be okay.

I have found death that brings out the best in people though.  The outpouring of grief and love from our little corner of the Universe was touching and overwhelming.  For this,  I am so grateful and blessed.

But what is okay is little things that used to bother me, don't any more.  Her death has given me great perspective on what is and isn't important.  If someone needs to speed past me, get on the grocery line first, or say something without thinking first, fine.  I am hugging my family and friends longer and harder, saying "I love you" more, especially to those who need hear it, and I am trying to remember to BREATHE. I forget to breathe a lot. I need to stop and breathe DEEP.  Every breathe I take, honors my sister-in-law, my family, my friends, and especially me.

So if little stresses come up over the course of your day,  it is okay.  Because you are still here.  And that is a wonderful thing.

Thanks for sharing your precious time with me and my words.